


Strange Relationships

by spacemonkey



Category: Fake News RPF
Genre: Crack, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-11
Updated: 2016-05-11
Packaged: 2018-06-07 19:12:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 757
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6820645
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/spacemonkey/pseuds/spacemonkey
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>John does Stephen a favour. Written in 2007</p>
            </blockquote>





	Strange Relationships

**Author's Note:**

> This is a little ridiculous, and my first time at writing John, but I kinda love it. I don't think Jon wears it anymore, but back in the day he used to have a grey shirt that he wore everywhere that's referenced in this fic.

“No, it’s not nearly grimy enough.” Stephen frowned, stepped back, and frowned deeper. He let out a sigh. “It needs to be grimier!”  
  
John coughed. “Are you implying that Jon is grimy?”  
  
“Have you seen the man?” Stephen paused for a moment. A distant smile overtook his face. “I have. But he usually wasn’t wearing a sh-”  
  
“I think that’s quite enough on that subject.” John looked down at his clothes. Grey shirt, cargo pants, black boots. “May I ask what is with the grey shirts all the time?”  
  
“That’s just Jon.” Stephen shrugged. He walked over to the desk, muttering, “He’s always been like that.”  
  
“It’s like self deprecation in a colour.”  
  
“I suppose you could put it that way.” Stephen held a leather jacket out, smile on his face. “It’s not complete without this.”  
  
“I don’t wear leather, Stephen.”  
  
“You do now. Come on, put it on. Come _on_!”   
  
John sighed, but reached for the jacket. He slowly put it on, Stephen watching him the entire time. John would never say anything, but he was worried about the mans mentality.   
  
Alright, so he had mentioned it once or twice, but it had fallen on deaf ears. Best keep his mouth shut, John had always thought.  
  
“What do you think?” he asked tiredly.   
  
Stephen stepped back again, finger pressed against his mouth. “Hmm, take off your glasses.”  
  
John did so, biting back a sigh. He placed his glasses on the desk, peering through the blur at Stephen. “How’s that?”  
  
“Much better! You’re still a bit tall, though.”  
  
“Would you like me to lop off my calves?” John questioned tightly.   
  
Stephen shook his head. “Jon would never agree to that, so you shouldn’t either. But then, Jon wouldn’t have to . . .” He looked thoughtful again.  
  
“I am not going to cut my legs off, Stephen.”  
  
“I know!” Stephen shook his head. “I think you’re done! Well, as close to done as you’re ever going to be.”  
  
“Wouldn’t you like me to dye my hair grey? Perhaps wear a wig?” John looked down at himself again. “I mean, the clothes are right, but none of the facial features are even close to being right.”  
  
“Oh, don’t worry about that,” Stephen laughed. “I’ll just turn off the lights. Or maybe close my eyes.”  
  
“So you won’t be seeing me at all?” John said after a slight pause.  
  
“No. And you won’t be speaking either. It will ruin the illusion.”  
  
John huffed. “So all this has been for nothing?”  
  
Stephen shrugged. “Well, maybe not nothing.” He clapped his hands together. “Tell you what. I’ll dim the lights, but leave them on a bit so that I can see the clothes. And your hair. It’s about the same colour Jon’s was when he first started, so that will work.” He grinned. “It’s perfect.”  
  
“Perfect is not a word I would use, Stephen.” John stared at Stephen, taking in the expectant face. When he’d gotten this job, he’d never thought he’d end up here: dressing up like Stephen’s ex lover to make the man happy. But there was a legitimate, if slightly deranged reason.  
  
“And you’re sure that this will get me a raise?” John asked, not for the first time that day.  
  
“Huh? Oh yeah, sure.” Stephen was fiddling with the lights, obviously only half listening.  
  
John sighed. “I really need the money. Plane tickets home are quite hefty in price, Stephen!”  
  
“You’ll get your money!” Stephen found the right balance in light, turned back to John. “Now, take off your clothes and get on the desk.”  
  
“But I just put them on!” John complained.   
  
Stephen rolled his eyes. “Alright, _I’ll_ take them off!” He sauntered over to John, grabbed hold of the jacket. “I’m gonna ride you so-”  
  
“Stephen, please.” John held up one hand. “Can we not do the dirty talk? This is disturbing enough as it is without you vocalizing it.”  
  
Stephen glared. “I thought I told you no talking. You’re ruining the illusion!”  
  
“I’ll be quiet, just as long as you will. That’s the agreement,” John insisted.  
  
Stephen fiddled with the leather jacket for a moment. “Fine. But you better be good. Jon is _fantastic_.”  
  
John didn’t say anything. What on Earth could he say to that? He just nodded.  
  
Stephen smiled. “Let’s get it started, then.” He started to slide the leather jacket off, whispering, “This will teach Jon not to break up with me.”  
  
“You’re going to tell him?” John squeaked.  
  
“No talking!”  
  
John hung his head. The things he did for a bit of money.


End file.
